Choosing sides

Okay so today I was hit with a question that made me question my entire outlook on life…Horde or Alliance? I have been playing Warcraft for about 15 years now, 5 of those years playing the soul sucking World of Warcraft. For those of you who don’t know because apparently you spend your time underneath a rock, the two opposing factions in the World of Warcraft are the noble Alliance filled with members that still need their parental figure go ahead to stay up late, and the honour bond Horde who fill their ranks with slightly psychotic video gamers, a scary notion in its self. Now back to the matter at hand, both factions offer in depth back stories of redemption, courage, and other fancy words that make them look heroic, while still having those moments in their history that you kind of ignore them and say “Nope, I don’t know them”. So in terms of story they are equal. If you ask what about gameplay, I meet you with a swift hand to the back of the head and move swiftly on. What it comes down to for me is what you want to do? Do you want to battle the various 1s and 0s designed to take on different forms and shapes, i.e., PVE; or to battle the ridiculously massive fan base and pray and hope they aren’t playing with a Rogue, i.e. PVP. In truth I play Horde for PVE and Ally for PVP. Why? Because the Ally for some odd reason always win PVP, because the Horde couldn’t be bothered to follow simple instructions and their thrust for blood always get me killed. The Ally however seems able to think during a blood thrusty encounter. However during a PVE such as a rad, they start to panic at the smallest hint of trouble running around screaming likes four-year old girls. Horde takes up the challenge and barrels on through honoring their blood carving nature. Of course there are exemptions to these rules, for example if you are playing against an all-Russian PVP team, you’re fucked either way. Thanks Putin. 

I got myself a hat

So a weird thing happened to me yesterday, I graduated and for some reason I don't feel any different.  I mean I worked my ass off the last three years literally, I lost like 10 kg in one year. All that for a piece of paper that says I am officially qualified to be a business analyst and not in so many words. All the people around me were crying and hugging,  my parents gave me that proud of you son look and my friends through their arms around me similar to when Man United scores a goal...which this season is not often. Honestly I don't feel the same way. To me it was just something I had to do, and I now need to do the next thing. The ceremony was impressive,  but as a hat was being held over held over my head, I couldn't help but think first: what is up with all the hats, second: really all that work for this? The argument 'it gives you opportunities' has been through in my face but so could cutting off my leg and replacing it with a peg leg. 

Reaper of Souls

Now we're talking. When Blizzard announce Diablo 3 after the same amount of time it takes for some one's hopes and dreams to die, I have to admit I was happier than a pig in a microwave. However Blizzard decided to meet my child-like anticipation with a large dump on my very soul. Diablo 3 was for a lack of a I am not very comfortable using here, a large disappointment. It was the same length as a pack of crisps and was about as fulfilling. But I have to admit they redeemed themselves with Reaper of Souls, mostly. The expansion of Diablo 3 completely change the special cousin of the Diablo family (the one you keep in the basement and is only ever mentioned in shame), and made it the energetic little brother that won't calm down and is consistently doing something new and different. The loot system replaces the auction house and does the game justice. The icing on the cake however, for me at least, is the added missions for your followers. During the 10 hours of playing the original, I have to admit I became attachment to the scoundrel and the witty conversation him and my barbarian would have. The expansion expands...haha...on the relationship bringing new wittier dialogue and even added sided mission resolving certain issues the follower had. Each sided mission brings the warm feeling of helping someone who consistently got in your way but kept trying like a faithful jack russell and kept going to completely uncanny places when any rational person would of through up their hands and yelled "Are you fucking insane?". All in all the expansion manages to save the origin from the savage stoning it had to endure and the absence of butterfly witches is always something to be happy about.

You Hollywood! Stop this shit!

The movie world is filled disappointments and failures. The worse is when the prostitutes of Hollywood take a beloved character and try ring every cent out of it till there is nothing left but a husk of its former glory. The Smurfs seem a prime example. As a child growing up the Smurfs taught me a lot of things. The person wearing different clothes to everyone else is often the leader or main villain, one girl in a group of guys is a slut and that you can replace swearing with the word Smurf and it sounds retarded. But when the movie came out, I refused. Too often had an eagerly waited in line for the movie adaption of my favourite cartoon, book, comic book, or game, only to leave feeling disappointed and in need on a good brain bleaching. Ghost Rider, Green Lantern, Prince of Persia, Under Dog, all was seen by an innocent mind and produce one of anger and pessimism.

 I don’t understand how this could happen. Usually the main reason this brilliant idea turned into a shit movie is the lack of story or bad choice of leading actor. The Ghost Rider franchise screwed the pooch on both counts taking the most bad ass character in the Marvel universe and making him a whinny little tart that Nicholas Cage  is held solely responsible for in my opinion. Ghost Rider is one of the most complex stories in Marvel so A) why make a movie about it unless you know it will be great, B) get Nicolas Cage to be Johnny Blaze and C)Fuck you Cage.

Max Payne was the game that sat close to my heart. Although the graphics were in need of a fine tuning the story and action kept things entertaining for me. Once you have shot the bad guys while jumping in slow motion, there is no better way to do it, unless you have a sniper rifle from four blocks away powerful enough to remove the bad guys arm no matter where your bullet made contact. Then Mark Walberg decided to laughably to make a movie adaption. The movie’s only saving grace was Mila Kunis. Apart from her there was only one scene with slow mo and Walberg’s desperate attempted to make us care about him….Go away Mark.

But there have been certain game changers that have made me rethink my position. Iron man and Batman being the top two. That being said here are some ground rules I believe.

·         No video game adaption, just no.

·         If you must make one of a comic book, use the fucking comic book as a story.

·         Don’t use Nicholas Cage or Mark Walberg, and sad to say Ryan Reynolds. Buddy Green Lantern and R.I.P.D were shit.

·         You will never be as good as the source material. Scott Pilgrim vs. the World the movie was good, the comic is better….much better.

With all that in mind I would like to leave you with a thought…they are making a Warcraft movie. Shit.

I see what you did there

They say that with any new blog you need certain things that make it stand out from the millions of others on the web. So what makes your blog an island of truth and relevance in an ocean of lies and porn? Well that comes down to personal choice. First you need a topic to write about, and preferably one that is close to the heart. If you are a murderous sociopath that would like to share their cutting techniques with the world, then that is what you should write about and expect a visit from the local law enforcement agencies about. The next is you need to provide something that no one else can provide. A talking dog comes to mind, but since that husky on YouTube has stolen the spot light, I am pretty sure that almost every idea has been thought of, faked, and posted on the web with a ridicules amount of followers trying to take a moment out of their miserable lives by watching it. Let’s face it if you rummage through the piles of stupidity the internet mainly consists of, to find real life pokemon (that everyone else can see is a cat and its owners need to be arrested for painting a cat yellow), then you need to rethink your life.

So what makes me stand out? To be honest, not much. Think of me as the ranting Swed from that sheep in the big city cartoon where I will complain too much, and to my heart’s content about everything and anything. Expect I don’t have an annoying voice or an obviously brain tumor causing my head to be explaining large.   If you feel this is the wrong attitude to have in this life, then that is your own opinion which I respect. We live in a day and age where to have one’s own opinion and be able to share it openly is something to celebrate and by celebrate I mean sit in front of a PC for 8 hours a day complaining about the new World of Warcraft expansion because the Elves ears are just to pointy and therefore hard to replicate at the next Blizzcon. I feel if you expect things to be shit and that people will let you down, then when they are or do, you are left don’t feeling disappoint, and you get to say “I told you so!” in that smug voice that makes people want to hit you in the face with a chair.

“But Dubu you ridiculously hairy man, aren't you being a bit hypocritical?” Frankly yes and that oddly is my point. The internet has given us such amazing power but as Spider-man keeps nagging about, “With great power, comes great responsibility”. As the ones defining the internet and its uses, we must make sure that the contents are those thought stimulating and interesting topic and the content that isn't is kept in the dark pits of the internet that you climbing gear and a flash light to find. We should teach the correct ways of using the internet and show people the good and bad parts of it ensuring both the advantages and disadvantages are clearly described and understood.

So like my blog, don’t like it. Find it interesting or spill your coffee due to its unreasonable nature, I don’t care. I am writing because I can and I feel that I should. Call me what you will, I have probably been called worse and that is your opinion which as previously stated I respect, besides if you truly felt I crossed a line and wanted to do something about it, you would have to tear yourself away from your computer screen, which let’s face it, isn't going to happen until you stop masturbating. 

Introductions are in order

Hey guys how's it going?

Welcome to my new blog and thanks for taking the time to venture out into the random part of the Internet and read the thoughts of a crazy man how calls himself Dubu. Dubu is the Swahili word for bear, how the Swahili people know what a bear looks like still is a mystery to me. The reason I am know as that is because of a nickname I was given and the fact that i live in Africa.

This blog is an extension of me so therefore it will contain what I enjoy doing, namely playing games, watching television, listening to music, and generally giving my opinion although no one is listening. Stick around if you are willing to read the random thoughts of some one you have never met, or leave now. Your choice.