Well that was
unexpected. I truly don’t know what to say. When Disney decided that their next
victim was to my childhood molder and then destroyer, Star Wars, I honestly
thought the mouse was just looking to finish the job of episodes one, two, and
three by deciding that a seventh episode was required in the franchise. Many of
my more tolerant friends devoice there excitement about to the next film with
such gusto, that it was swiftly met with a kick to the manly area and a verbal
beating equal to German blitzing. Even when the trailer came out, I approach
with abused spouse saying “I won’t be fooled by pretty pictures and teasers”.
Regardless, I decided to spend the money and watch the film a few days after
launch in order to miss the really eager fans who would gang up on me and give
me their equivalent of a beating when I wore my parody Star Trek shirt. Why,
because I fucking can. But to my surprise the film wasn’t have bad, didn’t
completely ruin my vision of my childhood. It was like seeing a person you worshipped
as child grow old the right way, they
will never be the same again but you are content with how things turned out,
not in a wheelchair grabbing the nurses arse every chance they get and begging
for a quickie if a blue pill is present. The plot, is on Google so go look for
it. It had this nice balance of new and old characters, with the exception of
Luke and if you have seen the film you know why. The villain kind of bugs me,
but not to the point where I want to force choke him to death, and I do wonder
why the dark side seems to attract winey little girls that are on the verge of
tears almost always and have a tendency to temper tantrums resulting in
billions of rands of damage or someone’s death, whichever comes first. All-in-all the film itself is…..okay. Nothing
really more to it. I enjoyed because it exceeded my expectations for me to
acknowledge it and not enough for me to base my religious beliefs on it. It’s
like a concrete block. It isn’t pretty and isn’t something to brag about, but
there is potential for something great to be built upon it, or a giant mouse
penis.
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