So it occurred to me
while I was doing manly bear things like crushing boulders and eating steak,
that I haven’t wrote about the fucking craziest thing that happened this year,
the summer Olympics…but then I remembered I didn’t care about that because I was
force wild animals into tiny balls. Pokemon Go lit the world on fire and
watched it burn. As soon as I came out everyone went fucking mad. Embracing
those cubhood dreams, I downloaded the apk, put on me best looking trainer cap,
and went hunting. Bulbasaur was my first victim…I mean catch and together I
thought we would take on the world, only to find a Zubat 10 minutes later that
was stronger than my plant dinosaur thing. Worked myself up to finally join a
team and thought I would pick the team whose leader gave the best speech. This
was immediately thrown out as the red team leader looked the hottest. Not much
to go on in terms of a leader but fuck it. All bugs a side the game consumed me
like a fat kid left alone in a room with a cupcake. But then I noticed
something I was actually going outside a meeting people because of this
game….weird I know. While writing this entry I had the application open cursing
the fact that a Dragonnite can take 40 balls to the head like the world’s best
porn star and beg for more. Sadly I could not obliged the slutty dragon as I
had no more to give. Aside from the dangers it brings which is poorly because
people get retarded suddenly when Pokémon is mentioned let alone played, the
game is fun a gets me outdoors. Now if only people outside would fuck off back
inside.
