DC, why do you do this
to me? Was it something I said, something I did, or that time I didn’t read
your comics because I couldn’t read yet. Either way, I didn’t deserve this. The
amount of hype that went into this movie, you would swear it was the preview to
the second coming of Christ. Poster, Harley Quinn’s ass, promo art, Harley
Quinn’s ass, TV spots, Harley Quinn’s ass, press releases about reshoots
happening, Will Smith’s ass…sorry got confused there. I saw something about
this movie for the past 3 months trying to get me to watch it. From the get go
everyone knew this was going to be like trying to wax a bear, messy and potentially
ending with a limb missing. A movie about the villains and you are recasting
the joker? Fuck Warner Brothers, why don’t you jump off a bridge, it would save
us all time and be more entertaining. Plot is a group of bad guys try to be
better than what they are with the possibility of dying, hence the suicide
part. Although the villains aren’t part of the starting 11 of the DC villain team,
they are on the bench. Deadshot, Killer Croc, Captain Australian stereotype, Japanese
girl with a sword. Although they aren’t the first names to come to mind when
discussing the recipes of chaos in the DC universe, together they are greater
than the sum of parts. But enough of the bullshit, let’s get to it. Plot was
messy, trying to sow together loose parts of the story with the accuracy and
grace of a pregnant cow in a row boat over a waterfall, which would have been more
entertaining than this. The movie was average, ordinary, mediocre, normal, common,
keep testing the synonym function of Word. It’s like the producers spent so much time
finding a great cast, giving a great deliverance, keeping to the characters,
when they finally remembered “Fuck we actually got to come up with a story”
after a late night with Jager bombs. The story seems thrown together at the
last minute like that high school project due the next day, with the “that will
do pig” mentality. I guess I have to address Jared Leto being the new Joker,
and to be honest there wasn’t enough screen time for him to really do anything
with the character. Besides you’d just be looking at Margot Robbie and praying
she bends over to pick something up off the fall with the rest of the cast.
